Week 74, 75 and 76

Dear Momma,

*Disclaimer: I'm really really sorry! But we have to leave to Tacloban in 15 min so this is going to be a SHORT email. I'm sorry!

Hehe trunky na! You are so cute Mom! I'm doing my best Mom- just plugging through and trying not to think that someday I will have to leave! Tomorrow is our last leaders-ish meeting in Tacloban so it's crazy. I just can't believe it. This week, it kind of hit me hard. And my feelings were really sad. I kept on just having this feeling like I wasn't good enough (like I know that I've really done my best on my mission, but I think it is kind of normal- especially for people with kind of a perfectionistish personality- to think about how much I still have yet to accomplish before I go home). It is so hard to think that this time will end. And not to scare you Mom, but I started thinking about extending. I really wanted to. I was praying, just kind of pleading with Heavenly Father- "just give me 6 more weeks to do the things that I wanted to do. I know that if I just had 6 more weeks I could become the perfect missionary and do everything I wanted to do." I was just praying that I would get that confirmation "Yes Sister Snow! 18 months isn't long enough, you should extend!"... Well like always, He works in funny ways. So as I've been praying and pondering this last week, I've been kind of distanced from the Spirit. You know how that is, when you are trying to force what you want to happen? Then Yesterday, I got down on my knees before personal study and just told Him- "Sige, I'll do what I need to do. I'll go where you want me to go- in the time that you want me there." And I just remember one of the last times I said that same prayer- as I was waiting for my mission call and trying to decide when to submit my papers. And then just listening to that song all day everyday for 3 weeks waiting for my call. Well, doing what He wanted me to do last time worked out pretty well. As I was reading during my studies, I was just looking for something to tell me that I needed to stay. And honestly, I can't remember where I was reading, but I just remember feeling like- I'm not perfect yet, but I'm not supposed to be. I still have weaknesses (Lots of them), but I have a lifetime to work on them. I thought that getting set apart as a missionary would make me perfect automatically... and it didn't. I guess I thought that serving a mission would make me perfect automically too... and guess what? It didn't. But I think its all part of the process Mom. There are still people to serve at home, there are still beautiful people to meet, and marvelous things to learn. So for now, I'll give it everything I have while I'm here, serve and love and learn, but I'm not going to be scared of going home. Because this is a LIFETIME mission- not just 18 months. (see D&C 15:6, Ether 12:27, Hebrews 12)

I love you Mom. Sorry- I might not be able to email Dad but I have the best stories! Thank you for the update and I'll chat with Ry next week about school- I'm not going to stress yet. 

Thank you for everything! You have been in my prayers! Especially with Harvey and that Earthquake- just stay safe oy!

Love,

Sister Snow

Week 75

Hello my sweet Mom!

I just want to tell a short story! So remember those kiddos who used to come to church? They are so cute, but they live so far away! Like a 45 minute ride in a jeep and then a 45 minute walk to their house because we can't ride a single motor. So usually we just teach them when they go to church, but they haven't been the last few weeks :( SO we tried to visit last week, but it was raining. And last time we went out there in the rain, we both got super sick after. So we didn't. But on Saturday, it was raining SO HARD. As it torrential rain storms. But we were like sige- we have to go visit them. So we were just praying that it wouldn't be raining or at least that we wouldn't get sick afterward. And as we left the house to go ride, we were just singing "Master the Tempest is Raging" and praying for those sweet tender mercies. Well after we got about 30 min out of the city, the rain stops. And then we got out of the jeep- still no rain. We start walking and on either side of us is just rice fields so you can see miles and miles of land. And we can see on either side that it was raining everywhere else. We were just in the lucky little sunny spot. It was a real miracle. There were more tender mercies that day as well, but it sufficeth to say the the Lord provides a way for us to stay in His little patch of sunshine, even if the tempest is raging on either side.

Love you always Mom!

Week 76

Momma- 

 Thank  you so much for the long email. I have a lot to tell you, but mostly I just want to say: Thank you and I love you. You mean the whole world to me. To be honest, it's been kind of a hyper-emotional week. So busy. I had my last MLC, Zone Conference, and Zone interviews. So now there is nothing left but to work. And I am glad. I'm doing good. I love this mission. I love it so so so much. And it scares the literal poop out of me thinking of coming home. And it breaks my heart to leave these people I love so much. But at the same time, I know it is the right thing and I can't wait to see you. But I am not excited for the work and transitions and a big heaping scoop of real life that's waiting for me there. But that will come in time. I love what Sister Iverson said, because that is EXACTLY what I've been thinking of doing. So when I get home, 

1. I'm going to hug and squeeze you as much as I can! I'm going to eat a BUNCH of Mexican food.

2. I do want to work at the homeless shelter and volunteer and just do as much service I can. 

3. I want to see if I can work in the temple- if not, just go as much as I can. 

4. try to get my English back in order... 

5. Just help you, I know you're so busy so I hope I can apply some of my Filipino cooking/ cleaning skills I've learned. ;)

I am me mom, so don't stress. I 'm not going to stress too much about getting bored.

hehehe

 I honestly am really scared for how much has changed since I've been gone. But I know that we can do this. We can do hard things mom.

So this week was... incredible. And hard. So we went to an MLC with Elder Haynie and it was so good. He just talked real real with us and just really motivated me to push these last few weeks out. I'm pretty stoked. That was last Monday which is why we were in Tacloban. Then we had zone conference on Wednesday. It was so cool! I got to see my sweet mission daughter Sister Sagairan for the last time. I love her so much- I was so glad we saw each other. The biggest thing I grabbed from those trainings was just to have hope for the future. Whatever comes, we can do it and be happy. I guess just "bloom where youre planted". 

Then on Friday we had zone interviews. President Argana is so inspired. I didn't even have to tell him about any of my concerns- he just knows. And he said exactly what I needed to hear. 

Anyways, It was just a good week. I love my ward, I love my companion, I love this life. Thank you so much for your love and support and prayers. I feel them, and  send them back  your way too!! Love you forever momma.

Love,

Sister Snow